A little trip to the promised land.

by carmenmariamandley

ImageAnd so we return from Mecca. Exhausted. Unshowered. Fulfilled. Road weary. 16 states. 26 hours of driving. 30 mix CDs. Time with 18 different friends. 1200 miles. Terrible food. Wonderful Food. Too much food. Sweet Tea. One Grotto. One Apple Orchard. A million moments of gratitude. Lots of tickling. 4 billion hugs. Silliness with a 7 year-old. Silliness with a 3 year-old. Silliness with a baby. Silliness in general. More hugs. Hoarse throat from singing with Caitlin driving through New York, Pennsylvania, Maryland and other states. Player’s Retreat. Possible work offers. Nostalgia. Melancholy. Going back to the Ampitheatre. Going back to the teaching Theatre. Going back to the Mainstage. Falling in love with the Shimmer Wall. Seeing the huge new world at the Science Museum. Talking a lot about the Nickel Shakespeare Girls. Loving. Living. Being as alive as is possible. Every day.

ImageThis one I love.

ImageAnd this one.Image

Also this one.

Raleigh nights remind me of so many things. Danger, love, terror, losing my mind a few times, laughing, late fits of artistic frenzy, desperation, learning, making love, being anesthetized, all those crazy kids. bands, and almost losing it all.

 Locked rooms and locked doors and

Sun bursting through the cracks

 I smash my face against the rock to feel it

My imagination allows me your breath

You see, I’ll never see you again

Light, night, reeds the smell of

green and leather and blue, deep purple

Filled with little feet

And I can’t see you for the lights through the door

I can’t see for the vein on your hand

The freckles on your cheek

Wrinkled knuckles

Time weary eyes

I seek, I sue, I breathe in Technicolor

One touch will never

Can never be

Fingers of yellow fill your eyes

Peel your spine right from you

Peel your skin

You would be my skeletal lover

Wrapped sharply, sucking heart matter

Leaving me with one real touch

And a memory of jade

Wines, wires, party games, wind

I love you I said and he knew

I adore you I said and his mouth found me.

I worship you I said as he walked away

And I name the days (This skeletal lover)

For each piece of your vertebrae, each constellation

Every day my body shrinks [Blackout.]

Lover, come home.